Death by Squats; Northern Aggression; 4/7/21

Eight. No wait, nine. No, actually, eleven (sort of) curfew-breaking pax posted for an overnight sip of water and bravely faced down the consequences in the public square.

The Pax: Blue Hen, Epstein, Elaine, Dr. Evil, Boone’s Farm, Flounder, Kay, Tardy (who was, but only a little), Slice N Dice (whose performance was as close to a Full Starsky as KVegas has ever seen. Look it up.), and an FNG. And QIC FloRida

After a quick romp around the block, made a little more exciting by the loose wire hanging over the sidewalk (is it live? Is anyone willing to find out? Will the yellow caution tape provide any protection?), the pax circled for:

Warmarama: SSH, Chinooks, Sun Gods small and big, Seam Rippers, Peter Parkers and Parker Peters.

The Thang: From the center circle in front of town hall, follow each sidewalk spoke to its end, perform the indicated exercises, and return to the center for 50 squats. Proceed around the wheel, traveling down each of the six spokes and returning to the center each time.

Spoke 1: 25 Merkins and 25 IC LBC
Spoke 2: 25 IC Shoulder Taps and 12.5 IC Moon Gods Each Side
Spoke 3: 25 Carolina Dry Docks and 25 IC Reverse LBCs
Spoke 4: 25 IC Plankjacks and 12.5 IC Side Plank Scissors Each Side
Spoke 5: 25 Burpees and 25 IC American Hammers
Spoke 6: 25 Curb Bangers and 25 Rocky Balboas
50 Squats in the center after each spoke = 300 squats.

Each participating Pax, which did not include Slice n Dice, completed one lap and was working through the second when time was called. Tclaps to Dr. Evil, Flounder and Kay who faced the Burpees station twice. Woe to Tardy, whose starting position meant he completed the other 5 stations before starting on Burpees.

Returning to the bank for Mary, the pax encountered Slice n Dice, who posted sometime between 5:32 and 6:07, but, whatever… Recognizing the tsunami of mumblehazing about to be unleashed, SnD thought fast and EH’d some passerby, miraculously redeeming himself by recruiting an FNG. Turns out Dustin has been stalking the pax for a while on his bicycle, waiting for the Most Dangerous Game to begin. But now predator has become prey and FNG Huffy (re: the bike brand) is now part of the pax. Welcome Huffy!

Don’t think for a minute, Slice n Dice, that anyone will forget a posting for Mary only, no matter how many FNGs you bring. Just a pinch short of a Full Starsky.

COT: Elaine’s sister-in-law with severe vision problems after brain surgery; Dr Evil’s sister Barbara traveling from GA to Houston for medical treatments; Chipper’s ongoing recovery – nothing says ‘Get Well, Soon’ like a spate of hospital gown jokes. Kay led us out.

A special joy for YHC to be back ITG, and always an honor to lead. FloRida