Pain in the Park: Blame it on the New Guy

Pax: Special Ed, Checkbook, Doubtfire, Tramp Stamp, Sprinkler, Epstein, FloRida, Scott Mason (FNG), Lucky Charms, Fudd, Sludge, Tarde, Dr. Evil (QIC)


  • SSH’s, 20 IC
  • Sun Gods, Sobriety Style, 30 IC, Reverso

At this time, we noticed that Tramp Stamp was wearing his socks for gloves. YHC really thought that they were sock puppets…

Image result for grown man with sock puppets

  • Seam Rippers, 20 IC
  • Monkey Humpers, 25 IC

Wait. The FNG knew how to do monkey humpers already? Who brought this guy? Who vouches for him??

Mosey to corner for the first decision: Quarter flip for straight or left toward the school. The FNG, Scott, chose–much to the chagrin of the pax–the quarter flip to go ‘off the grid’.

Across the street for the next flip–3 or 5 burpees for each stop sign? Some redemption here, as he adroitly chose for 3 burpees. YHC, out of spite, chose 5 burpees per fire hydrant.

At the bottom of the hill, another quarter flip, left or right. FNG called the flip to give us a left direction–onward to the hill.

Decisions by the FNG will be done by a quarter flip for some decisions or picking one of two envelopes marked by the choice number.

Next stop: Quarter flip for number of mail boxes you run to before returning to the mailbox for the exercise….FNG called for 3 mailboxes. Extra running. The first “Choice envelope” chosen by the FNG was Worst Planks Ever (minus the Makhtar N’Diaye’s–no fun on pavement if Kay’s not present)–3 per mail box.

Let the fun begin to the end of the road. Nice work by Lucky Charms, Doubtfire and FloRida as Sugar Rays. Also, great work by FNG keeping up. Good pax work keeping him in the fold. We all had our first day…and this one sucked.

Note: No sighting of Drive By. Miss seeing him at our Sunday nights, at least.

Leaving the neighborhood, we moseyed to the amphitheater by the school. Choice 2? FNG pulled World of Merkins on the benches. Perfect.

Mosey to the parking lot. Choice 3? 15 monkey humpers per line. That’s a lot of monkey humpers.

Mosey to the basketball court. Pair up. Partner 1 does suicides while Partner 2 does Choice 4, BTTW’s. No one is happy with the FNG’s choices….


Scott, originally from Watertown, NY, Near Canada… Labatts? Molson? Nope, too cool. Marine. Works as a videographer…Videographer…hmmm, Ron Jeremy?..nope. Videos of RV’s and parks? Cousin Eddie. Done. Welcome to F3, Cousin Eddie!

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Cousin Eddie @ Work. Really. Not kidding. How to prevent the s*itt*r from getting full.
  • Twerk running in a half marathon in Wilmington
  • Next weekend, work at New Story Church–Flo Rida to provide details.
  • Two weekends, approximately: helping Pacer move to new house, will get details from him.
  • Sunday night Talent show at Main Street UMC: plenty of appearances from the Pax including Doubtfire’s 2.0 and possibly him.
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That’s Doubtfire. In front.
  • Tarde led us out.

Always an honor. I really hope you got enough.

Dr. Evil