The Pax: Checkbook, Elaine, Radar, Deliverance, ForTran, Dean, Bambi, Crawdaddy, Dr. Evil, Boones Farm, Red Hot, Duvet, Chipper, Fudd, ShearConn, Flounder, Kay, Man Hands, Epstein, Gilmore, Blue Hen, Spicoli, Sludge, FloRida (QIC)
Two dozen appropriately-dressed men faced the windy gloom with fleece and determination. Only one was bold enough to spend an extra half-hour in the elements. YHC arrived to the glorious sight of shovel flags blowing in the wind, planted by Checkbook before he launched his frostbite-tempting extra credit.
Kotters to Man Hands, fresh off the Disabled List, and T-Claps to Fudd for his sophomore post in tough weather without a flinch. Single-digit windchills sent the Pax to the back of their closets for one more layer. Bambi wore pants. Epstein wore sleeves. And Gilmore …
Sensing mutiny potential as the Pax shivered during the Gathering stage, QIC skipped the disclaimer entirely, ignored the possibility of an FNG (In this weather? Unlikely!), and moseyed to the warm-up circle while Spicoli, possibly wearing board shorts under his sweatpants, was still exiting his car.
A brisk WARMARAMA to get the heart rate and the core temperature up: Side Straddle Hops – 15 IC
Chinooks – 10 IC
Helicopters – 10 IC
Cotton Pickin’ Seam Rippers – 10 IC
Mountain Climbers – 10 IC
QIC instructed the Pax to form three lines, each headed by a coupon carrier, then held his breath waiting for the chaos. But, no! Exceeding all expectations, all dropped neatly into line for an orderly mosey to the ball field to begin THE THANG:
Partner 1 – run the hill 3 times. Backward up and forward down. Burpee at top and bottom. Carefully step around the frozen puddle.
Partner 2 – Makhtar N’Daiyes with Shoulder Tap
Cobains to the Pax, particularly to Gilmore, for QIC’s lapse in Q-appropriate demeanor during the instructions. #StillLearning.
Resume three lines, now a little ragged. 2nd man steps up to carry Sludge’s channel coupons and lead the pax to the track for the next phase.
Partner 1 – 10 pullups
Partner 2 – Mountain Climbers
Reverse and repeat 1 time.
Resume the coupon mosey, now led by 3rd man, trailed by a distinctly non-linear gang of Pax. Mosey to the car-rider benches for phase 3.
Partner 1 – 20 Derkins, Partner 2 – Thighmaster Left Side; Reverse
Partner 1 – 20 Dips, Partner 2 – Thighmaster Right Side; Reverse
Partner 1 – 20 step ups each leg, Partner 2 – Carolina Dry Docks; Reverse
Blue Hen, who may or may not have been the fourth man in line, took up a coupon and led the way to the front field, followed by an amorphous blob of unlined Pax, proving that YHC’s fear of chaos was premature, but ultimately correct. At the front field:
Partner 1 – Backpedal halfway across the field, drop for 1 Burpee then run back. Dr Evil smug in his declaration that HIS halfway point was, in fact, THE correct half-way point.
Partner 2 – Bobby Hurley’s
Reverse and repeat for 3 rounds total.
Abandoning any hope of forming lines, QIC invited someone… anyone… to pick up a coupon and lead the straggle of Pax back home. Coupon swaps OYO during travel to the basketball court because Sharing is Caring. Last coupon handler returns the coupon to the shed, while the rest of the Pax circles up for 6 Minutes of Mary.
Dolphin pushups 10 IC – something new. Begin in Chilcut Plank. Raise your six up to a pike (drydock) position, then return to the plank. Think of a dolphin rolling across the surface, or, according to Dean, a slightly more carnal motion. Fun for lower abs and lower back.
LBCs – 15 IC
Moon Gods – 10 IC each side
American Hammers – 25 IC
Circle of Trust
Remember Sludgefest January 26. See Slack for your personalized, engraved invitation. $16 per person, plus a service charge in the form of warm gloves and toboggan hat to donate to Crankbait’s homeless ministry.
Heartfelt reminder from Gilmore to remember, support, encourage all the brothers of the KVegas Pax, including those not in attendance on any given day.
Reminder from Kay to maintain current contact info, including emergency contact, on the master Q sheet.
Sludge led us out. Always a privilege to belong, a joy to participate, and an honor to lead.