Pain in the Park, “Failure to Communicate”

Seven loyal pax braved the great outdoors and the threatening rain to enjoy a bit of movie-based frivolity around the friendly confines of the Fourth of July Park and Kernersville Elementary School.

Pax:  FloRida, Sludge, Pacer, Checkbook, Mulligan, Doubtfire, Dr. Evil (Q)

It went a little like this:


  • SSH, 20 IC
  • Sun gods, SS, 30 IC, Reverso
  • Cotton Pickers, 15 IC
  • Copperhead Squats, 15 IC
  • Peter Parkers, 15 IC

Digging a hole

  • Form a line to remove all of the pavers from their “hiding place” to form a pile in the field
  • Plank in a line up the hill to move the pavers while in a plank up the hill to move the pile
  • Move the pavers down the hill while in a plank
  • Use line to restack the pavers in their “hiding place”

FloRida, a student of the movie, knew every line–thankfully!

The Chase

  • First convalescent center, step up and over each of the tables
  • Down to the playground, step through the swings
  • Across the bridge, hanging from the outside
  • Second convalescent center, under each of the tables
    • Checkbook noticed he was lactating chocolate milk, so he moved to a plank
  • Up to the memorial area, don’t touch ground as the pax works their way around the outside of the fence

Pax noticed that YHC was actually taller than the statues, and Pacer, though modifying completely (youngest of the Pax, I might add:) ) did stop to take a picture, and YHC is sure that it will certainly show up….

  • Third convalescent center, across the tables on all fours
  • Back across the bridge on the outside
  • Bear crawl the length of both benches at the park ampitheater, don’t touch the ground
  • Up to tennis courts, up and down the retaining wall until the end, ~15 times (Doubtfire didn’t see that I was carrying a chalk stick and marking as I went.  “If you can’t do it, you can’t…well, you know.)
  • Across basketball courts, step across both benches
  • Crawl bear up the small hill to mountain street

“No bloodhound would be able to follow someone doing a crawl bear…”  Sarcasm drips, really…

  • Skip, two steps with each leg per sidewalk section to field in front of school

“Okay, now I feel it….”  mission accomplished

  • Shake the bush, mosey across field, stopping to do five burpees in the middle, then three burpees, then 1 burpee on successive passes
  • Mosey to bottom of hill near bus loading area
  • Up and around each of the trees, performing ten monkey humpers on the sidewalk each time
  • Down the steps at the end of the benches…running out of time!
  • Bunny hop down the sidewalk, one jump per section to end, the back up to the sidewalk 

Mulligan is actually quite the bunny hopper….

  • Over and under each section of railing up to the parking lot

Looked at the pull up area, but without Tarde we were lost…

  • Backward lunges down the hill, stepping only on the lines to gate, because they have anti-smell capabilities to confuse the bloodhounds…


Omaha!  That was it.  YHC had so much more, but, alas, even Cool Hand Luke ran twice, so maybe this is in our future…

Quickly mosey back to the cul de sac, for 30 American Hammers IC.  Thanks for the jazz hands, it makes it all worth it.


  • Pay Kay for website, we need to raise $300, about $10 each.
  • Pray for the Pax participating in Pilgrammage Weekend (Crankbait, Fortran and Blue Hen)
  • B3 on Sunday night at Lowe’s from 5-7pm.  Bring an FNG.
  • FloRida prayed us out

Always an honor, hope you got enough…

Dr. Evil

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